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Let’s Call it a Day
Somewhere, theology buffs are having an argument about the meaning of the word ‘day’ in Scripture. My interest is more practical. I’ve often wondered if all the well-meaning, self-improvement types have ever stopped to consider what ‘day’ actually means. With the best intentions, they assure me that I need only 20 minutes a day of aerobic exercise, 8 minutes (the shortest workout I’ve found) of daily weight training, and an easy five minutes morning and evening of gentle stretching. Perhaps they haven’t met St. Teresa of Avila, who counsels no less than 30 minutes per day of silent prayer in addition to daily Mass (58 minutes, round trip, for me), and Morning and Evening Divine Office (10 minutes, minimum, each). If I pray the rosary on the way to Mass, I don’t have to add that to the tally – a blessing, as you will see.
So far so good, but there’s still the house to be maintained. “A matter of minutes!” claim the various systems – it’s just a matter of subdividing all the chores into monthly, weekly, and daily bits, then putting in a half hour or so twice a day plus teaching kids to pick up (quickly now, we’re running out of time!) after themselves before nap and bedtimes. I figure if I make mopping monthly instead of weekly, change window washing from quarterly to annual, toss out cobweb clearing (and take off my glasses in the house), and move wood-floor-waxing and refrigerator-coil-vacuuming from the annual to the when-you-need-a-laugh pile, I can keep up with the house cleaning in 60 minutes plus another half hour to supervise and inspect the kids’ chores.
Did someone mention food? Let’s not count the two-hour weekly grocery shopping adventure, or the half-hour meal-and-list preparation (I could do that while eating, right?). All that’s left to put into the daily mix is an hour for lunch and 90 minutes for dinner, assuming the kids all feed themselves breakfast while I do a workout or chores. Moving quickly through the must-do’s, let’s add a half-hour each for laundry, mail-bills-checkbook-updates, email/phone calls, bedtime rituals for kids and personal grooming (fit 10 minutes of flossing and gum massage in while waiting for kids to re-do chores). Factor in eight hours per twenty-four to sleep (all tasks done during sleep hours count as ‘multi-tasking’ and aren’t added to the total) and a five-minute bathroom break every two waking hours (try to get at least one child in for homework help or training in righteousness to make the best use of these precious minutes).
Now, it looks to a disinterested third party like you’ve got about six hours per day left to fit in doctor’s appointments, Christmas crafts, friendship maintenance, phonics instruction, lifelong learning, gardening, face-to-face time with each child and hubby, photo albums and scrapbooks, spiritual reading, volunteer service, vacation planning, and family togetherness. The problem is, Reality. Toss in morning sickness, an elderly parent, a nursing baby, a flooded bathroom, a prayer emergency, a car breakdown, an escaped pet snake, a broken leg, or any other Thing That Actually Happens, and you’ve just lost your Miscellaneous Other Projects time. The family can still be together, but it may have to be in the doctor’s waiting room. You and your husband can still chat, but he may be under the car at the time.
Maybe you could take three years instead of one for Spanish in Thirty Minutes A Day, in ten-minute increments. Five minutes per day of Piano Exercises for Adults is better than none (forget the family sitting around learning to play the recorder together a la Von Trapp family music camp!). Twist red and white pipe cleaners together for candy-cane ornaments instead of hand painting a ceramic crèche. Cultivate friendships only with other moms and send all the kids out together for the half hour daily nature journaling you’ve been meaning to fit in. If they can become scientists and artists while becoming physically fit and socially adjusted, you’ve just accomplished More in Minutes!
What it boils down to is this: all the multi-tasking in the world can’t produce enough hours in the thing called a ‘day’. Whatever the theologians decide, moms will need a much longer-term perspective to keep a sense of balance and accomplishment. Ponder these things and don’t forget to write your thoughts in your daily journal (just 20 minutes daily) if you have time after ten quick minutes of lectio divina or stress-relieving, two-minute facial massage!
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